Family Photo Shoot

We just had our family photo shoot today! Mark did such a great job!! I highly recommend him!!

http://markempasisphotography.myshowit.com/thurmonds2009/index.html

I apologize to any of you who follow the blog regularly and haven't seen updates! Things have been quite busy....between getting in the groove of having Finn around, finishing the my classes for the winter term, and getting ready to head to Medford for Christmas- there has been little time for blog updates!

As you might imagine, Christmas has been truly amazing. We could not imagine a better Christmas day than what we experienced yesterday. We arrived in Medford Wednesday morning, and Finn was quickly greeted by family members. Everyone simply adores him and he is loving getting the attention! He is just the sweetest little guy, and we are so extremely blessed to be his mom and dad. Today we did our first family pictures- I can't wait to post them! For now, here are a few we've taken over the past several days!

I can't believe Finn is a month old already! He's becoming more alert everyday! You wouldn't believe how strong our little guy is either! He's already holding his head up- I think we might try a little tummy time this week :)

Settling in...sort of

We just can't stop staring at our little Christmas miracle. If we're not staring at his face, we're looking back through our camera at pictures of him. We are absolutely in love with Finley. He's perfect.

Justin, Finn, and I spent our first few days in Seattle. Our first night together was definitely an adjustment. Justin and I were both up all night...hearing every sound that Finn made. Saturday morning, we thought it might be fun to go to the Space Needle. Due to the newness of everything, and our lack of sleep, I was not feeling confident enough to take on something like that. We decided we could just stroll around Pike Place....wrong. That seems to overwhelming as well. We settled for a walk to Whole Foods. We're so exciting ;) We have now moved on to things like an outing to the mall and restaurants. Baby steps!

We were fortunate enough to be invited to our friends' house, the O'Brien's, for dinner Saturday evening, as well as Justin's boss's house Sunday evening. It was nice to hang out in an actual house (opposed to a hotel), and have a home-cooked meal. We drove to Vancouver, WA Monday afternoon where we will stay until we are told we can finally go home to Portland. My mom and dad are on their way up this afternoon to spend some time with us. We can't wait for Finn to meet his first set of grandparents!

Every moment seems so surreal...we just can't believe how quickly our life has changed. It's so amazing. I can't stop saying it...."God is soooo good!!!"

Finley Matthew Thurmond has arrived!!!

Well, it has been a crazy journey to say the least, but we finally have our Finn. He is about 7.5 lbs, and 19" long. He was born healthy and eating very well :)

We left Portland this morning, and met with Tiana and her family a little after 1pm at Tiana's house in Yakima, WA.

It was a wonderful meeting. When we got there, Tiana's father was holding Finn and he said "Would you like to hold your son?". Wow!! Their family friend/pastor, who was also at the house, prayed over all of us, as did Tiana's father and Justin. We gave Tiana our gift, they gave us a few gifts, and we visited for a couple of hours. Around 3:30 we were leaving their house with our baby boy!!!

We will have to spend the next week in Washington state due to interstate adoption laws. We decided to head over to Seattle for the first few days to sort of make our time in the state a little vacation. We plan to head down to Vancouver, WA Monday to spend the rest of our time, as it is just 20 minutes away from Portland. As soon as we get the call from our caseworker that we can cross back into Oregon, we'll head home!

We feel so incredibly blessed. We cannot believe how amazing this day has been! We are so thankful to have such amazing and supportive family and friends. Thank you all! We love you!

Our God is so very good!

I cannot believe I am about to type this....we're going to pick up Finn tomorrow!!!!!

Our caseworker called about 20 minutes ago to let us know that Tiana has changed her mind again. We are going to Yakima first thing tomorrow morning to pick up our little guy! We will have to stay in Washington state for a few days, but we hope to come back to Portland sometime next week.

I don't have time to type much else...lots of re-packing to do! Oh my gracious!!!

It could have been us....plus a semi-update

Today I looked at our profile on Bethany's website- the "placement pending" stamp has been removed and we're now able to be shown again. While I was on the website, I noticed a new family had their pictured grayed out with the "PLACEMENT" stamp on it. This couple was the same couple that we sat next to at the seminar in Seattle last May. It sort of set in at that point that we could've been the ones with the successful placement. Why not? Why couldn't we have been selected by the birthmother that chose them? I'm not saying I wish in any way that this couple went through what we did, but why did it have to be us? I guess it all sort of hit me hard to see their placement stamp when we were once at the same place as them just a few months ago.

On a different note, my sister called this morning. She knows of a family that are the foster parents for an 8 week old baby. The baby has heart complications, and the family does not feel that they can be the adoptive parents. I asked Kate to find out the extent of the issues with the baby's heart. We're not so sure we can take on an extreme health condition either. We hope to hear more about the baby's condition and see where it goes from there. Because the baby is currently in the foster system, we would have to see what hoops we'd have to jump through with the state to even make this happen. So, we'll just have to wait and see what further information we can get about the baby from the foster parents. This lead may not turn into anything, but it's something to think about none the less.

More Closure

Yesterday, I walked into the nursery for the first time since we lost Finn. It was so overwhelming, that I just walked right back out. Today, I decided to try again. First thing I noticed- Justin so thoughtfully took Finn's name off of the wall. That made it easier to stay in there. I slowly began unpacking everything. I started out with the bottles and formula, as I figured those items were least likely to have any emotions attached to them. I surprisingly unpacked everything so far without a tear. I wasn't expecting that at all. There was one bag left to unpack- the baby clothes. I almost left the nursery, as I thought I probably wasn't ready for that part. Then, I decided I needed to just get this over with.

There were a few items that I just stared at....remembering the last time I touched them was when I envisioned bringing our baby home in them. As I quickly unpacked the rest of the suitcase, I realized the reason I hadn't cried today. I wasn't sad- I actually was angry at Tiana. For the past week, I kept saying I was not angry with her for the decision she made, but I am. I'm so angry. I know that if we weren't the ones with aching hearts right now, it would be her, but I'm still angry. We spent so much time preparing for our little baby, developed a love for him, and felt connected like we never thought we would to anyone that we've never met before. She took all of that away from us. So yes, I guess I am entitled to be angry. And you know what? If felt so good to let that feeling out.

Who knows, maybe I'll just be sad again tomorrow, but for today- I'm angry. And honestly, if feels like a small weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. Maybe I'm relieved to feel something other than sadness today. I know that each day will get better (which is something I didn't beleive a week ago). I am so thankful that we have so much support to get through this. I am thankful for so many things, as my dear friend has been so kindly to remind me of each day this week.